Tag: humor
member name: Tara R.
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March 08, 2007 10:48 AM EST --
For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations. . . .
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March 08, 2007 10:53 AM EST --
Tickle Me Elmo
There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys.
The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.
Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she . . .
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March 08, 2007 11:59 AM EST --
Dear Tide Company:
I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've
used it all through my married life, as my Mom always told me it . . .
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March 09, 2007 12:39 PM EST --
Browden is my 5 and 1/2 month old AmStaff puppy.
He really has such an awareness...and it's so funny.
A couple of weeks ago my father-in-law (who lives right next door) planted a new bush . . .
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March 16, 2007 10:25 AM EDT --
Paddy was in New York
He was patiently waiting and watching the traffic cop on a busy street crossing. The cop stopped the flow of traffic and shouted, "Okay, pedestrians." Then . . .
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March 16, 2007 11:11 AM EDT --
After retiring, I went to the social security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized . . .
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March 20, 2007 12:38 PM EDT --
I walked into a Blimpie's with a
buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a
sandwich. I handed it to the girl and she
looked over at a little
chalkboard that said "buy . . .
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March 26, 2007 12:29 PM EDT --
An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her Shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding . . .
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March 20, 2007 01:15 PM EDT --
Senator Hillary Clinton was invited to address a major gathering of The American Indian nation two weeks ago in upper New York State ...She spoke for almost an hour on her future plans for increasing every . . .
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March 08, 2007 10:34 AM EST --
Where do pets come from?
A newly discovered chapter from the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to "Where do pets come from?"
Adam and Eve said, "Lord, . . .
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June 06, 2007 03:09 PM EDT --
Received in an e-mail and wanted to share....
When I'm an old lady, I'll live with each kid,
And bring so much happiness...just as they did.
I want to pay back all the joy they've . . .
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February 20, 2007 10:00 AM EST --
For all you mums, or mums to be!!!
I was out walking with my 4-year-old daughter. She picked up something off
the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from . . .
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February 22, 2007 09:33 AM EST --
A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there's a 'peel and win'sticker on her coffee cup.
So she peels it off and starts screaming,
'I've won a motorhome! I've won . . .
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February 20, 2007 10:05 AM EST --
* Excerpts from a Dog's Diary*
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and . . .
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March 01, 2007 12:19 PM EST --
This one is for everyone who ...
a) has kids,
b) had kids,
c) was a kid,
d) knows a kid
e) is going to have kids.
I guess that means all of us!!
DADDY'S GONNA EAT YOUR FINGERS .
. . .
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February 26, 2007 03:19 PM EST --
A lady walked into a Lexus dealership just to browse.
Suddenly she spotted the most beautiful car that she had ever seen and walked over to inspect it.
As she bent forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, . . .
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March 06, 2007 02:57 PM EST --
My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, "62." He was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?" . . .
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March 08, 2007 11:56 AM EST --
REMEMBER HOW TO DO THIS LADIES!
An older lady gets pulled over for speeding.
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I . . .
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March 08, 2007 12:07 PM EST --
A tour bus driver is driving with a bus full of seniors down a highway
when he is tapped on his shoulder by a little old lady.
She offers him a handful of peanuts, which he gratefully munches up.
After . . .
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March 06, 2007 01:58 PM EST --
Q. HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY?
-answers written by kids-
(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should . . .
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